Yesterday
while browsing through Instagram and swiping right from one story to
another, one particular story caught my attention. Melanie Murphy, an
Ireland-based writer and YouTuber used her platform to speak about dating online and the ups and downs of dating life and
how that particular aspect of life has now been affected by the on-going pandemic.

She
was, of course, speaking from her friend’s perspective as she herself is
happily married and has a child on the way. Her own story is also unique as
Coronavirus interrupted her wedding function – she ended up marrying at the
marriage registration office with very limited number of people in
attendance. 

She
shared her friend’s experience and said that she had just begun to actively
search for a partner before the pandemic began. She added that it’s been rather
challenging for her to find a partner online as she doesn’t find online dating
to be effective like many others.

Now
this is a story that a lot of people can relate to. It’s not simply about
meeting physical needs – which again have been interrupted by the uninvited
Coronavirus. Melanie even joked about how people would now first be concerned about
the results of Coronavirus
test instead of the STD test before going forward in their relationships.

Due
to the pandemic, pubs and parties have been put on hold. Nobody feels safe and
comfortable in socializing physically, and this has gravely impacted the
chances of meeting new people. We no longer get to hang out with friends at the
bar or just generally go about our businesses without thinking about the
consequences. Of course, this has lowered the chances of finding love.

Melanie
gave her own example and wondered what would’ve happened if she had not met her
partner Thomas at a party that one time. She was seemed fearful even thinking
about the possibility.

By
sharing this experience, she led us to think about some serious needs. Nobody
wants to be alone as it’s not a good feeling. It’s important to feel every bit
of your emotions and validate them. Loneliness can impact your physical and
mental health significantly. In normal circumstance, dealing with loneliness is
hard, so one can only imagine the severity when you feel this way during a
pandemic – when you’re stuck at home, craving emotional and physical intimacy.

Basically,
she encouraged her followers to think about their feelings and possibly talk
about them to their friends and family. You can feel much lighter by sharing
your frustrations and disappointments. However, by ignoring your emotions you
put yourself at risk of developing a serious mental health problem. Repressing
your feelings never did good to anyone.

Of
course, there will be people, who’d make fun of basic needs and desires. The
truth is that they’re not in touch with their own emotions either. Finding love
and affection is one of the most significant needs of human. There are people
who’re living all by themselves during this pandemic and they’re simply craving
basic human connection. Talking on dating apps and social media websites is fun
for people in the beginning but even that has its own set of restrictions.

Dating
is hard and relationships are messy – but you know what is even more challenging
during this pandemic? Being
stuck with an abusive partner!

No
one can even imagine what these victims would be going through. Research has
shown that cases of addiction and domestic violence have elevated significantly
during this lockdown. Victims are completely helpless during this awful
situation and to say that things are complicated, would be the most understated
statement of the decade.

However, it wouldn’t be fair to compare these
two situations. You can’t say that people who’re feeling lonely are desperate
or whinny. You don’t know what one is going through, so saying nothing is
better if you don’t have any words of support. Both situations are awful!

With
that being aside, there are some people who’re actually embracing this period. They’re
working on themselves and growing as humans. We must not forget that singlehood
is also the most fun time for many of us! You meet people online, there’s some
innocent flirting, there are no attachments, and you’re simply exploring and
discovering yourself.

There
are so many people who’ve mastered the art of singledom! Of course, it’s even
more fun without the pandemic because no one can deny the rush of adrenaline when
you hook up with random strangers at the pub and never see them again.

It’s
actually quite a crazy time to be in because some people are enjoying and
rediscovering themselves but for others it is an actual hell. For now, all we can do is
hope that a vaccine comes out soon!

Meanwhile, don’t forget that sometimes you fall in love with the most unexpected person and at the most unexpected time!

Till then, let’s be more empathetic and less judgmental because we truly don’t know
what the future holds. Also do read Alone
Together: Love, Grief, and Comfort in the Time of COVID-19 by Jennifer
Haupt as no matter where you stand in your relationship or life right now, you can easily relate to it and find comfort!